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Month: February 2017 (Page 2 of 2)

Schizophrenia and Playing To Win The Lottery Jackpot

Today I woke up and checked the numbers for last night’s drawing.  They didn’t look familiar.  I didn’t win the jackpot.  But I was visualizing like crazy over the last three days and I thought that would increase my chances of winning.

I just read an article on visualization and winning the lottery.  You can find it here.

In the article it basically says there are other ways you can get money, if that’s what your after, and winning the jackpot doesn’t have to be the way that happens.  It doesn’t advise for or against visualizing to win the lottery, but it encourages you to leave your options open.  As for the schizophrenia effecting me, and what I’m hearing, well… that’s a different story.

You see, I haven’t had problems with the schizophrenia effecting my behavior for a while.  I’ve been holding a job for a year and a half and I’ve been growing with the company.  They’ve made me a Sales Coordinator, the only person in our chain of 3 stores to have that position, and they’ve made it clear they will reward me for positive performance.

But even with another raise, and bonuses, I’m still not making the kind of money I want to make.  That I want to EARN.  So over the last 3 days I’ve turned my visualizations to that of winning the lottery and despite the schizophrenia, I’ve been very successful at visualizing that I’ve won the jackpot.

But as my visualizations grew stronger, and as I began to believe that I could too win the jackpot like Cynthia Stafford, I started hearing more voices, louder and clearer.

The one voice that stood out, above all the others, was that of my father in law.  His voice has been a staple in my consciousness since the day I got married.  He told me, after one of my visualizations, as I was smoking a cigarette, that he didn’t want me to win.  The other voices chimed in and said my life would be a mess, that I was a mess and money would only make it worse.  I kept saying to my father in laws voice “No” and I kept saying to myself “I just have to visualize harder to make this happen.”

One a separate occasion, yesterday, the day before I found out that I didn’t win, I heard his voice say “I don’t want you to win”.  Clear as day and coming to me as if he was right in front of me.  Sometimes the voices come from the right or left, but this time it was straight ahead, seeming to come out from the neighborhood.

I told him, in my head, that “it’s not up to you” whether I win the jackpot or not.  His voice agreed.  His voice just doesn’t want me to win.  According to his voice he wants to live a “peaceful life” and me winning the jackpot would be excitement that his voice doesn’t want in his life.

In reality, I love everyone.  I love friends and enemies alike.  I love prospects that tell me no, and prospects that will take extra time out of their day to talk to me.  And I love my father in laws voice, even when he seems to be telling me things I don’t want to hear.

You see, I love the voices.  To me, that’s the only way to be.  They talk nicer to me when I love them, in fact right now, their saying “love”.  They say, where your attention goes, energy flows.  So for me, it may as well be flowing towards love.  Love is what I love and I want more of it in my life, now.

And I also want more money.

Don’t get me wrong, I love what I’m doing right now, even when I’m counting the hours down, wanting to hate it, I replace that by saying to myself “I love this, this is what I want to do.”  You might say that keeps me stuck doing something I really don’t want to be doing, but hey, you could argue that this is the best job I’ve ever had, and your not going to go without some days dragging on.

So I want to work my current job, even if I get rich somehow, and keep that stream of income coming in strong.  The job makes me feel like I’m being of service to society, something that not all schizophrenics can do, and I value that feeling.  But I still want more money, and I want it any way I can get it.  Either from working more, winning the lottery, blogging, or writing books, I have to earn more income.  So in all likelyhood, I’m going to keep visualizing my lottery win.

But I like the above mentioned article on visualization and winning the lottery.  One of the suggestions it makes is to instead of visualize winning the lottery, visualize having more money!  That money could come from more than just the one way of winning the lottery!  For me it could come from working, or writing.  So I think I’m going to take my number, my goal, of 100 million and just visualize that money being in my bank account.  It could come from anywhere so I won’t limit my visualizations to just winning the lottery.  I will visualize the app on my phone that displays my balances, and visualize a balance of 100,000,000.00 dollars.  I think that’s a better ticket than just visualizing to win the jackpot.

Now you may be asking yourself, what value can I get from all this.  And the value here is that even if you lose a jackpot, even if you fail for years, it’s not over, you can still manifest success.  You can do it at your job, and you can do it at home.  There are varying degrees of success, and I am living a low level of success right now.  I’m holding an hourly job!  There paying me more money!  I’m taking care of my family!  And I’m doing it all as a schizophrenic.  So if I’m a schizophrenic, hearing voices that tell me to die on a regular basis, and if that’s not annoying I don’t know what is, and I can do have success, even if it’s on a small scale, I know that you can have success too.  Wasn’t that a run on sentence that was still worth reading?

Because my grammar isn’t perfect but the meaning inside of my words is passionate.  It’s alive and real and you can feel it, can’t you?  Leave a comment and let me know what you feel as a result of reading this.

Where’s the value?

The value is that in spite of something like schizophrenia, which actively seeks to disassemble the fact that I AM ALIVE, you can have success.  At your job, at home, wherever you go!  My result so far is that I’m working an hourly job successfully and holding it down for over a year.  But I won’t settle for just that.  I won’t settle for 15,000 or 16,000 or 17,000 dollars a year.  I have to make more than that.  I have to reach for my goals.  I have to take massive action in the direction of my goals.  And if you take the lottery and put it aside, my goal is to EARN 15,000,000 dollars.  That’s what I’ve calculated will sustain me and my wife, and my children for the rest of our lives.  And if I made 100,000.00 dollars a month, like Pat at does I would be able to hit my goal in less than 15 years.  More than likely my niche will change from schizophrenia to making money online, as there is a bigger audience of very hungry people out there for that niche.  Although it’s competitive, others have broken through, and I believe I can do the same…. but dear God I do have massive action to take to get there.

But writing blog posts is a good start.  I also post all of my blog posts onto my twitter account each time I publish a new one.  I’m getting new followers all the time.  I must be doing something right.  My next step is to get Adsense going on this site, a step which is causing me trouble as I don’t know what the hold up is.

But another piece of value you can get from me right now, is that, from everything I’ve learned up to this point if you want to make money online, one way you can do it is to blog.  And the more you write the more traffic you will get.  So my advice to you entrepreneurs out there is to write your tail off.  Write everyday, post everyday, and share your posts on social media.  And write whatever you want, but be sure to include value in there.  If you want your readers to like or love what you’ve written there’s got to be a lot in there for them.  So write everyday, and write valuable things.  It got me a comment, and it can do the same for you.  And you can be sure that I’m going to tell you about my little successes along the way, when I’m writing these posts.  I want to deliver advice, valuable advice, in a proven way.  I am going to walk the walk, so to speak, and tell you about it when I write.

So if you want to know how a schizophrenic can work an hourly job and grow in that job, or if you want to know how to get a comment on one of your posts, I’m your man, because I’ve done both.  I’m walking that walk.  And there’s plenty more where that came from.  I’m highly optimistic about the future and it motivates me to work, to do more, and I am attempting to do more for people than anyone else does in my niche.  I want to inspire schizophrenics, empower them, and be the one that is the catalyst for them to take their lives to the next level.  Because a diagnosis is not the end of the world.  It’s just something you have to work harder to overcome.  Really, you could even look at it as a blessing because now you know what you have to do… you have to work harder, and harder to overcome this condition.  And you can do it!  I am proof that it can be done!  Go for it and don’t let anything stop you!  You are unstoppable!

Work hard, read books on self improvement, write a journal, reread your journal, set goals, and take massive actions that are going to bring you closer to those goals.  That’s what this schizophrenic says.  You’ll have good days and bad days, but rest assured that if your working on your dreams, most of the time, things are going to be looking up (as long as your attitude permits that).  And rest assured that there are plenty of other people out there working just like you, even competing with you (good or bad), and you have cohorts in your journey to making your dreams a reality.  The value here?  Dream big, and take massive action.  You can do it!  I, Jesse Creel, BELIEVE IN YOU.

But I want to thank you for reading this.  I appreciate you in ways beyond what words could express.  Please leave a comment and let me know what you think of this post.  Your valuable time will not go without gratitude.

Thanks again, With Love and wishing you much much success,

Jesse Creel


Hearing Voices, A Guide To Navigating The Waters

If your hearing voices everyday, you should definitely go see a psychiatrist.  They’ll most likely give you some drugs that will help you cope.  And you should take them, for the sake of stability.  And you should also seek talk therapy.

But I am not a doctor, and I can’t give medical advice.  All I can tell you is that taking RisperiDONE and talk therapy helped to stabilize me.  I have now been able to hold a job for a year and a half, and am receiving promotions there too!  I am able to contribute to my family and help support my two children and my wife.  Things are not always easy, but they are getting better.

Even with the Risperidone and therapy I still hear voices.  They just don’t effect my actions like they used to.  Now I know that I can have success, I just have to work hard it at.  And working hard I am.

I am however taking on new stress.  I have been promoted to Sales Coordinator at my job at Honeybaked Ham and my new job, one that I will do for a few hours a week, it to grow the companies sales.  This involves dropping off free samples and then following up, following up, following up, following up, following up.

I say that 5 times because in the book my boss gave me to read about selling their product, they say that you have to have 5 points of contact to sell anything.  So there’s much more to the job then just dropping off a free lunches and praying for sales.  There’s work involved, and it’s stressful.

I don’t want to come off as annoying, but I have to call my prospects repeatedly if I want to make any headway.  And I must make headway. I must make sales, and I must make many of them.  I’ve done great at working there as an hourly employee but this new position is going to require that I produce more.  Bring more to the table.  Be more.  Find it within myself to sell.  And on top of it all, I hear voices everyday, and sometimes I hear my prospects in my head!  Sometimes it seems like their actually talking out loud to each other, like the voices would in my head, and their saying hateful things about me.

But I can handle it, besides, we all get what we deserve.  This is just an opportunity for me.

But if you hear voices everyday, then you should probably just listen to them, and then, MAKE UP YOUR OWN MIND as to whether you want to act on the things their talking about.  Unless that of course is hurting yourself or other people.

For instance, the other morning, one of the voices shouted at me to floss! as I was brushing my teeth.  I thought that was a good idea and was happy to have a little reminder to take good care of myself.  That is an instance where I would recommend you listen to your voices.  If they are telling you to call out of work I would recommend that you just go into work anyways, and make your money.

Sometimes the voices will have good ideas, sometimes they will have bad ideas, just like you.  Part of life it making those decisions that are going to impact your life in a positive way.  We all just have to grow up and make good choices.

I suppose, in short, that my guide for navigating the waters of hearing voices everyday is to master yourself.  Their just voices in your head, they don’t control you, you control you.  You can succeed despite the challenges.  And take heart that there are other people out there, with the same challenges as you, living good lives.  You can have a family, a job, friends, a life.  I just want you to know, I believe in you, and I know that anyone can overcome what their going through and come out the other side a better person, better off.

Take care, and with time, may you live a great life.

Thanks for reading.

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