JesseCreel.com

For Self Improvement Since 2016

Tag: Personal Development

Schizophrenia And Starting A Business Online

Some of the voices call me a faggot.  Sometimes I feel like I’m walking and talking like I’m gay.  I don’t think it’s a bad thing to be gay, my uncle is gay.  I do think that I’m not gay, I just may sometimes look like I’m gay.  Like today when I was doing a lunch delivery.

You see, I’ve been doing these sales calls and when I do the regular work in the store I feel like the sales calls effect me.  They effect how I look and speak.  Sometimes I think in business you might be better off queer as a schizophrenic.

Nevermind that, I have a wife and 2 kids.  I’m not gay.  I’ve entertained the idea of gay sex, but I’ve never really been able to jerk off to it, if that tells you anything.  I will say that jerking off is doctor recommended.  I’ve read it in a book my counselor recommended I buy.  I did buy it and I’ve read more than half of it, and it helps.  So does talk therapy and medication.

The jist of it is it isn’t easy.

If your working on personal issues when your trying to sell it becomes even more difficult.  That’s why personal development is so recommended for salespeople.  They say if you don’t have a daily program your in trouble.

I do have a daily program.  I try, oh I try, to make it happen everyday.  I fail miserably.  I smoke cigarettes at 5 in the morning and fail to go to work because I feel so sick from not sleeping and smoking.  This is a terrible disservice to me and my family, not to mention all that’s good in the world.

So as far as personal development goes, this schizophrenic is trying and suffering and failing.  When I make a decision to stop smoking, something gets in the way.  Today it was my car making noises.

Today I was driving around seeking sales at neighborhood schools and towards the end of it my car started making a machine gun sound coming out of the driver side front wheel well.  My car is old and it’s got over 215,000 miles on it, I don’t know how much longer it’s going to last.  I wasn’t thinking about the future spending all that money on alcohol, and cigarettes, and now I have a problem that I hope doesn’t exceed my $2,500 credit card limit.  That would take me up to $17,500, because I need a car to drive for my job.  That is, if it took that much.

The problem is I made a decision to quit smoking and start saving money and paying my credit card off in January of 2017.  It’s now September 7th, and I’m still smoking.  This is the life of a schizophrenic.

This blog will be my testament that I did it, that is if I ever do.  That I quit smoking, and don’t drink to excess, and paid my credit card bill off, and I’m exercising, and I’m making more money, and my life has gotten amazingly better, because I made those decisions.  I just have to keep holding out that I have it in me to do it, although the chest pains are almost becoming comfortable.

My mind is fucked up, and my writing shows it.  I hope only that you can get something out of this, from my first hand experience of schizophrenia and starting an online business.

I know this hasn’t been about online business.  It’s been about my day. But I seek to deliver the goods so this is the story about a schizophrenic who tries to start an online business.

You see (and they tell me to “see” often) it’s become apparent to me that starting an online business isn’t easy.

I would think it takes hard work, but I’ve been working hard, and I still am not seeing any money.  It’s been over a year since I started this website.  How do you start a business online?

My original thought, which is still my thought today, is you create quality, valuable content and you get people to subscribe to your email list because they like what you write so much.  This is my 108th post and I have 2 subscribers to date, myself and a close friend of mine who I asked personally to subscribe.  I figured that presidents vote for themselves so I should be subscribed to my own email list.  At any rate, I have only 2 subscribers to show for all the work I’ve put into this blog.  No one wants to subscribe.

So really, that’s for now, how it goes when your a schizophrenic and want to start a business online.

I think it’s time I spend some time doing housework and serving my family so I’m going to wrap this up.  For now  I want you to know that I believe I can do it, just that the road is rough.  I heard it in a song and I think it’s accurate.  I’m going to keep going and if you check back on this blog, or subscribe to the email list you’ll get updates and you’ll get to better know this schizophrenic’s story.

Thanks for reading and have a Great Day,

Jesse Creel

2 More Deals Down, And That Makes 12 Career Sales

Part of me wants to write something different, something less about me, but I don’t want to disappoint on the title, so this post is about me scoring 2 more deals.

It came today when I looked at the deliveries.  There were three.  2 of them I had dropped lunches off to previously.  Free lunches, 2 of them, for them to be loved by.  Then they ending up ordering again.  It’s a beautiful process.

Right now I’m focusing on schools and I’m selling fundraising for the schools, for the students to sell our gift cards for the school to make money.  All I can say is that I do the work, I get paid, and I just pray that I’ll get the deal, that everything will work out.

I really am set up to do something epic right now.  I’ve got the school fundraising I’m selling, and I’ve got Christmas.  I hope to get a deal for each.  Really it doesn’t matter because I get paid whether I sell or not, I get paid to do the sales work, not for the sale.

So I’ve got a good job.  I’m happy.  The voices get worse the more I get involved with selling, but I figure that just comes with the territory and I’m in for an interesting ride.

I just wanted to report another one of my successes, a magical moment, for you so that you could trust me in the future when your on my email list.  I want to build this thing up for you, so that you become a raving fan of mine and buy everything I sell.

I’m working on an album now, and I’m going to give it to my wife first.  It’s really about her, as I write love songs, so I want to know what she thinks about it.  I’m pretty excited about the feedback as I’ve been working really hard on it.

Although I can’t kid myself.  Playing guitar and writing songs and singing them is easy.  I do it for fun.  I figure I might even be able to make a living at it.

So there’s a lot more to it than just making sales and earning a reputation as a great salesperson at my work.  It’s also about my hobbies, my personal life, my family, and the list goes on and on and on.

I got these two more sales, and it makes me feel better because they are investing a lot of money into me to get sales.  Hearing that it’s working is GREAT news.

I want to do more.  I want instead of visualizing that I’ll win the lottery to visualize being a “great sales success” at my job.  I figure it couldn’t hurt.  It would only take me out of one delusion into another, but one I might be able to actually do.

I don’t know if I ‘ll be able to actually do “great sales success”.  I’m addicted to cigarettes, drink alcohol, and party.  I don’t know that people with those problems can live their lives in balance enough to really have massive long term success.  I could be wrong.  I never thought I would ever make it this far with a sales job.

I am making it, despite my struggles in my personal life.  I am successfully earning a steady paycheck and helping to support my family.  As a schizophrenic, even though only mild and never hospitalized, I see that as an accomplishment.

I am accomplishing things.  I’m doing the right things and I’m getting better results everyday.  It’s a beautiful thing.

Hopefully the next post will be less about me and more about how I can help you, and I hope that I can.

Here’s to Your success,

Jesse Creel

A Story About The Benefit Of An Act Of Kindness

So I worked in the store today.  I had to be there at 7:30am which is an hour and a half earlier than usual.  I had to take a breakfast delivery into the city.  I did the delivery and then I came back to the store.  It took me about an hour and a half.

When I got back one of the women I work with, who tells everyone she is my girlfriend, asked me to pick up her some Dirty potato chips from the other store I was going to be working at for the rest of the day.  I had to pick up some tape for the pricing guns and bring it back to my home store so I would be coming back anyways.  So my coworker asked me to bring her the chips back with the tape when I returned.

I worked the rest of the day at the other store and then left.  I realized I had forgot to get her the bag of chips and I took a second to debate on whether I should turn around now that I was already on the road.  I could have told my coworker that I had forgotten about the chips and left it at that, but I decided to be kind and do her the favor she had asked me to do so I turned around and went back to the store.

They gave me an 80% discount so the chips only cost me about 30 cents.  I bought them and on the way out they came after me calling my name.  They said there was a delivery that needed to be done that they had forgotten about until just now.  As it turns out this was a special kind of delivery which pays $30 cash when you do it.  So as a result of me turning around to do a friend a favor, I ended up being rewarded by the universe by receiving more money.  I didn’t do it for more money, I did it to be kind to a coworker.  It just so happens that my kindness opened me up to receiving more money.  Go figure!

That’s just a short story that I wanted to share with you about how kindness can pay.  I hope you enjoyed it.  If you would subscribe to my list I will send you updates to this blog.  Make sure you subscribe!

Thanks for reading and have a blessed day!

Jesse Creel

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