The jackpot was at 100 million again.  That’s one of my numbers.  I play the most when it’s at 100 million.  And for the really big jackpots.  I have a bill made out for 100,000,000.00 dollars.  My mom gave me a bill for one million and I added two zeros on the end with a black marker.  Because that was how much I wanted.  I still play the lottery even when it’s not at 100 million so it must not mean that much.  I would be happy with any size jackpot.

To be one of the few who win big.  There have only been about 9 jackpot winners this year for the Powerball.  That’s less than one a month.  But if you think about it almost one a month is a lot.  That’s a lot of people winning millions of dollars.  The question I asked myself this morning, after I had checked to see if I won… was how can I create the energy that manifests a jackpot win?

I feel as though it’s coming to me right now.  I felt that way for the jackpot last night.  I still feel that way this morning after I didn’t win.  I feel like it’s coming to me.  It being a jackpot win.

I have thought about honing my powers and becoming the first person in history to win multiple jackpots.  Like 3.  Some would say that it’s not possible.  But I say anything is possible.  Give or take I probably have 68 years left.  That would be plenty of time to win three jackpots.  We could live in a 7 million dollar house.  The one I saw that is the most expensive house in our area.  A nice area.  And the house has a pool!

But really all we need is about a 500,000 dollar house.  That would suit us nicely.  Not too expensive but expensive enough to give us the room we need for our family.  And big enough to throw a party for our friends.

That’s probably what I would do with the first jackpot.  Buy a 500,000 dollar home for my family.

But really I didn’t win the 100 million dollar jackpot and my focus should get back to work.  I have to improve this holiday season… Christmas is right around the corner only 10 days away and I’m going to be working a lot of hours.  I love the paycheck.  But I do it for more than just a paycheck.  I do it to work the cigarettes off… to keep my sanity… to love what I do… to interact with different people…. to be a part of the team…. and bearing repeating to get PAID!

And I would never tell the people I work with this but my job is really… easy.  It’s easy working those long days when your on the road for most of it.  Just drive and deliver.  Get back, load up… drive and deliver.  It’s simple.  It’s an easy job.  There are some hard jobs there and I have a lot of respect for the people that do them.  And like lifting heavy boxes for hours, they probably think it’s not that bad.  Good exercise.  A man’s job.  Men mostly do this job.  It’s like glazing the hams.  You have to hold a torch in one hand and a can of sugar in the other.  You coat the ham with sugar and then take the flame over the sugar.  I tried to do that stuff but I couldn’t get the hang of it so they made me a delivery driver instead.

That and I do prep work for the store.  Make salads, ham salad, turkey salad, chicken salad, tuna salad.  Slice the ham and portion it out for sandwiches, I do that too.  Clean the store, I do that.  I do a lot around the store to keep it running smoothly and improving.  I have asked myself the question how can I improve my value to the company by 15%.  The answer I came up with was to sell it.  I would make money and be providing more value to the company by being a healthy salesperson.

I didn’t make any sales for the Thanksgiving holiday and it looks like I’m not going to get back out there before Christmas so so far I haven’t been productive.  But I have a burning desire to become productive.  It’s like the lottery, and winning the jackpot.  It’s work and something I love to do.  And I have that burning desire for outstanding success.

But I have the day off so I do laundry…. my wife asked me to put my sons Christmas present together, a bike, so I’m going to do that.  I should get to the gym today.  I should make a commitment to get to the gym today.  I pay for the membership…  I want to use it.  To get healthier.  And I really have to stop smoking.  I just can’t afford it.  It’s killing my health, it’s killing my bank account, the smoking lifestyle is bad for kids.  And I have two of them.  I’ve got to learn discipline and take control of my life.  I’m out of control being 14,100 dollars in debt.  I have to pay my card off.  I must have a zero balance.  And the only way that’s going to happen is if I stop spending my money on garbage.

But smoking does relax me.  It has consquences though.  And I’ve been thinking about those consequences and the voices have been talking about bad things that could happen for I don’t know how long.  I want to embrace Tony Robbins’ acyronim CANI!… constant and never ending improvement.  And I could turn my life around if I could change my lifestyle.  I could get out of debt and give more money to my family.  That’s probably the biggest challenge I’m facing right now.  Quitting smoking.

So all this is what I’m thinking about on the day I didn’t win the 100 million.  Again.  I still believe I’m a jackpot winner.  And I still think it’s on it’s way to me.  But winning can wait for another time.  I have work to focus on, and improving along this holiday.  What I know is that family is the most important thing.  My dad taught me that after several of my own mistakes.

For now I bid you good day.  Have a great day.  May it be filled to the brim with countless blessings for you, yours, and the entire world.  Thanks for reading.  Take care.